Bikini baristas serving Key and Gig Harbor peninsulas

Rick Sorrels

Special to the Gateway

Barely-clad espresso stand baristas received a lot of negative press last year in east Pierce County for their perceived “over exposure.” Everything was found to be “legal.”

After many quiet months, baristas — defined to be people who serve coffee — are now being arrested for selling a bit more than coffee in Snohomish County, and prancing around outside their sales stand with only a one-piece bikini at Puyallup’s South Hill.

There have been no reported incidents or complaints on this side of the Narrows bridges.

It has even been quiet in Gorst, home to “Espresso Gone Wild” for the past two years, a stand which entertains customers with “themed” costumes and, an occasional, pastie or two.

There are probably three dozen espresso (coffee) stands on the Gig Harbor and Key peninsulas, with more in the planning stages.

It’s hard to imagine, at $3 to $5 per cup, the ocean of coffee being guzzled to support all of these businesses.

Personally, I cannot understand why anybody would drink “bean soup” as a beverage. (I never developed the taste, despite my military service.)

Two “themed” espresso stands opened in mid-August: “Smoking Hot Espresso” on Purdy Drive and “Bare Espresso” at the Shell station long known as DJ’s on the Key Peninsula Highway.

“Themed” means that they will rotate costumes: cowboy, Seahawks, nurse, cop, etc. Their costumes have been late arriving, so they have been forced to settle on bikinis and lingerie as their continuing “theme.”

Smoking Hot girls have strutted around the parking lot in their bikinis, holding signs for car washes, as if passersby would ever see the signs.

The Bare Espresso girls come off as demure and modest, sequestering themselves inside, out of sight, with modest costumes and embarrassed looks.

“Bare Espresso” has experienced a series of equipment problems (espresso maker, not girls) and has been closed more often than open.

A third new “themed” stand, “Lattes and Lace,” opened Oct. 10 on state Route 302 at Wright-Bliss. They will have 30 different “themes” to rotate through, including pasties and tassels.

The managers and owners of all three of the new stands are adamant that their business is to provide the best product possible (coffee). The girls are only a “gimmick” to attract the customers’ first curious visit, they say.

Owners of other, long-established and traditional espresso stands claim not to be threatened by the newcomers. They are comfortable with their faithful customer base, and they wish the new guys good luck.

How much coffee can our two peninsulas drink? Facilities, menus and prices are all the same, give or take a muffin or two.

Yet there has been no sudden surge in population of thirsty espresso seekers. The economy has not yet recovered. The kind of “uniform” worn by the baristas appears to be the distinguishing factor here.

Will more espresso stands seek a change in “uniform” to remain competitive? Is skin a passing fad? Will citizens consider this a sign of debauchery or social maturity? Or will the coming cold winter and large goose bumps force long johns to be worn under the bikinis?

Time will tell how sophisticated the tastes of the peninsula residents really are.

Rick Sorrels is a past guest columnist for The Peninsula Gateway. He can be reached at 253-884-4649.