On Faith: Strengthening families in love and faith

Leelee Stewart

On Faith

One youth said: “My parents’ examples in living the teachings of the Christ helped me internalize the gospel’s principles in my life. The most important thing was just seeing in them that the gospel and the Church were central to their lives. It was evident in every aspect of their lives.”

That statement came from a Brigham Young University study of 3,000 young members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, living in various parts of the United States, which concluded that, for children to withstand peer pressures to do bad things, what they needed was to develop a personal testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Children have a right to live in a family that loves, appreciates and respects them. Home should be a sanctuary from the troubles of the world.

Teenagers may roll their eyes when their parents say “I love you,” but no matter what their reaction, they need to hear it — often. Children also need to hear their parents say those words to each other.

My father was an example of being liberal with praise and generous with forgiveness of his children, even into our adulthood. I remember talking to my sister about him when he was ill and facing death.

She said, “I’m really going to miss dad after he’s gone, because there won’t be anyone left to tell me how great I am.”

I hope my kids will say the same thing about me some day.

One aspect of nurturing is disciplining and setting boundaries for our children. In one study, very few youths complained about the number or strictness of family rules, and many more wished their parents had been more strict and given them greater guidance.

However, children may interpret discipline as rejection, so we need to discipline in the Lord’s way, showing love unfeigned, charity and a caring for the child’s welfare, despite any wrongdoing — without hostility, physical force, condemnation or threats — tools of the Adversary.

The Lord’s way challenges us to practice self-discipline and manage our anger. It’s not easy, but, as we teach in the Lord’s way, we increase the love in our homes and strengthen our families.

Former Church President Gordon B. Hinckley counseled, “If we would look for the virtues in one another and not the vices, there would be much more of happiness in the homes of our people. There would be much less of anger and rancor and quarreling. There would be more of forgiveness, more of love, more of peace, more of happiness. This is as the Lord would have it.”

We can take courage from the spiritual insight of another prophet, Elisha, recorded in 2 Kings 6:15-17.

The king of Syria desired to capture Elisha to stop him from advising the king of Israel. During the night, the Syrians surrounded the city where Elisha was staying with horses and chariots. A young servant boy exclaimed, “Alas, my master! How shall we do?”

Elisha assured him, “Fear not; for they that be with us are more than they that be with them.”

The servant’s eyes were then opened, and he beheld the “mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire.”

We have the same assurance: They that be with us in raising our children in righteousness are more than they that be with them seeking to involve our children in sin.

The armor of God placed upon children by faithful and loving parents and the shield of faith obtained through internalizing the gospel of Jesus Christ can help protect our youth in the face of the influences that seek to lead youth astray in today’s world.

On Faith guest columnist Leelee Stewart, a mother of four, has ministered to youth and children of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints at Gig Harbor. For more information, visit www.mormon.org or e-mail leeleec@comcast.net.